Friday, September 25, 2009

Euphemisms

I fucking hate euphemisms.

Use words. We are adults.

Breasts are breasts. I hate the word tits. I can hardly type it. Call them breasts. Not "celestial orbs" like I just heard, not funbags, not jugs, not anything like that. I can handle boobs. But that's about it.

It's called sex. There are a few terms I would use, but they do not include: doing the horizontal mambo and yes people use this, banging, nailing, and I even had an ex call it playing doctor.

To each her own. But if you want to get any with me, use real words.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

hehe, you're so awesome.

i totally almost agree with you. except sometimes i am too shy talking about sex to do it quite correctly.

and sometimes the crappy euphemisms are a lot of fun as jokes. (a few years back me and jake dressed up as milk cartons for halloween - we were "a pair of huge jugs." i'm sorry i just shared that - it's terribly tacky, and a terrible joke...but fun ;)

Buddhist, RN said...

YES! What a great costume. I'm one of those people who makes random phrases dirty so I come up with euphemisms all the time. I just don't use them when I'm actually looking for something.

I can't really say very specific words all the time but I have my limits! You'd think at 25 I could be more up front but nope.