Thursday, June 25, 2009

Today's post is about tattoos.

I might actually be posting daily. Sorry if you get inundated with posts if you don't check here very often. See, now I want to get this tattoo on my back. Here's a picture of it taped to my back. This was one of my ways to see if I really liked it. It's not the most flattering picture, but the idea is, I wanted to check it out first. I liked it. I will move it down a couple inches to center it more between my shoulder blades, but that's it. Or so I thought. For a while I've been researching tattoo places and I found one I like. But as I visited there today, got a business card, ensured it was clean and sterile, and had the guy price my tattoo and see how much detail I would lose, I started to get nervous. I've been talking about this for a while. Although it isn't huge, it also isn't a small tattoo. It's that large and in that place because my first tattoo was small and by my right shoulder blade. I got it at a terrible time in my life, and Mom knew it, and paid for me to get it removed. This is why I've waited years to think about another one. I didn't want another small tattoo by the shoulder blade. I don't like ankle or arm tattoos on me. And they would be hard to cover up for school. I don't want it on my hips, because I know my weight fluctuates, and I'm starting to lose some of it, and don't want the shape to get wonky. My back is looking like the only option. And a small cross, unless it's by the shoulder blade, would look silly. Does it look dumb? Does it look too big?

Another issue I'm having is with other people's reactions. I can think of a person or two who would probably dislike it a great deal, and to be honest, I'd rather not completely rule out the possibility of a relationship just because I want this thing. It's not THAT important to me. I mean it is, but it isn't. I began thinking about the phrase "If he/she loves you, it won't matter what you look like." This is true, but I feel like I should point out to myself that everyone is attracted to different people and looks and personalities. For example, I've never been attracted to someone with blond hair and blue eyes. I always end up dating people with dark hair and oftentimes green eyes. I don't specifically search for people with these traits, I just am more likely to be attracted to these people. Maybe there are people who just don't like tattoos, and won't be attracted to me. I can't even type this and lie to you all and say there's not a couple people in my head. But can I really be thinking of their opinion when I'm making decisions about my appearance? How much does that matter? Should I even care?

My priority in this tattoo, or any, is that it won't be hard to cover during school, it won't fade to a funky color (I'm getting it done in black and will retouch if needed), and won't be SO intricate that the edges will be blurry.

Also, this thing will take 2 hours, if I get that size. Ouch. I'm not into the whole pain=adrenaline thing. It only works with piercing. My old tattoo did hurt, and not in a good way.



Liz C said...

My only thought is that a cross is pretty religion-specific. It might not seem possible to you, but who knows, 10 or 20 years from now you might not feel the same way about that religion. And that large tattoo would be a bitch to have removed.

I now feel way different about a lot of things than I did 25 years ago. It happens.

Miss Emily said...

Well, I can't think of anything that I might be just as enthusiastic about in 20 years. It's why I didn't get something Catholic-specific, but the cross is pretty, and as much as Christians drive me nuts sometimes, I like Jesus. I guess I'm concerned with getting a tattoo in general.

I considered getting words, but can't think of a good placec to put them where it's easily covered.

Liz C said...

It would be hard to pick something so permanent. That's the main reason I never got a tattoo - I kept changing focus! The closest I got was when I was considering a perfect circle, because it's everything = nothing, the sun, the moon, etc. And my degree is in math. :)

Instead of such a large piece, how about something smaller scale, inside the triangular area where the top of the cross and the crosspiece is? I have a lot of moles on my back or I'd consider that area myself.